C. Hand asked:


By Dr. Richard Bayer

It’s no big secret: The economy stinks, the stock market is struggling, and businesses everywhere are taking drastic cost-cutting measures just to keep their doors open. And if you are one of the “costs” that have recently been cut—or if you just see the handwriting on the wall—you’re feeling America’s financial crisis in a very painful and personal way. It’s tempting to crawl under the covers and hide out until the crisis is over, but you simply don’t have that luxury. You’d better get busy preparing and executing your own layoff recovery plan.

            No one enjoys looking for a job, even in the best of times—which these clearly aren’t. It’s a process fraught with stress, rejection, and a lot of tedious leg work. But with a smart strategy for handling your finances, managing your time, and executing your search, you can turn what could be a full-on disaster into merely a bump in the road.       Approach the time immediately after you’ve been laid off with the same sense of purpose you felt with your job. Resist the urge to think of unemployment as the end of the world, no matter how upsetting it may be. Think of it, instead, as an opportunity to improve yourself and to make a fresh start. You can end up better off than you were before you got the ax.

The fundamental rules for surviving your job loss are simpler than you think. Read on for some tips to help you survive—and thrive—after the proverbial pink slip has been laid on your desk:

Negotiate the best possible severance package. (Hint: Don’t automatically go for the cash!) There are two keys to getting the best possible severance package. First, whether it’s the cash settlement or career coaching benefits, negotiate each item individually. This will give you more leverage. Second, decide what you want out of a severance package, without regard for the company’s policy. Many employees simply don’t know what they can ask for in their severance talks, but it pays to research this issue and give it some careful thought.

When you approach the severance issue, think of what will truly benefit you in the long term. Health insurance, for example, costs the company less than it would cost you. You can also ask for one year of career coaching and the right to select the coaching service. People often underestimate how much time it will take them to find a new job, so they accept cash for the entire settlement. The reality is the time in between jobs can be far less worrisome when your health insurance is covered and you have career coaching to help you stay positive and find a great new job. Cash may ease the pain in the short term, but it’s these other benefits that will set you up the best if you are searching for a job for a long period of time.

Don’t take it personally. Lay offs are usually the result of budget cuts and lack of business—and not a direct result of poor performance. Remember that lots of good people get downsized, and in today’s economy it’s happening more than ever. If you are the company’s most recent hire, or if your department is being cut out all together, your position can be in jeopardy regardless of how well you’ve done your job. But perhaps the most important thing to remember is that you’re being laid off because your employer is having trouble in a tough economy—which doesn’t mean that you can’t still be a valuable employee to someone else.

Seventy-eight percent of the unemployed people who belong to The Five O’Clock Club get a job whose salary is equal to or more than their previous pay. And while it’s not always possible to achieve that in our current tight economy, there are still plenty of companies that are in desperate need of quality employees. We stress this fact at The Five O’Clock Club. Remember that there is something else out there for you, and chances are, it’s a great opportunity that will improve your future.

Live as though finding a new job is your job. If you are used to showing up at the office from nine to five every day, it can be daunting to suddenly have hours of unscheduled time on your hands. You need to find a way to maintain the structure in your life and to keep some sort of day-to-day routine. A great way to do this is by using your old work hours to focus on your job search. Use that time to join trade organizations, schedule interviews, and network as much as possible.

At The Five O’Clock Club, we recommend that an unemployed person spend at least 40 hours a week on his or her search. If you do this, you’ll find that you have less time to lament your recent lay off and less time to sink into the negative thought patterns that are associated with it. Once your search pays off, you’ll be glad you quickly hunkered down and devoted so much time to finding a new job that’s right for you.

Manage your money responsibly. Whether you receive severance pay or not, the way you manage your money immediately after being laid off will determine your worry level during the foreseeable future. If a cash settlement is part of your severance package, you might be tempted to maintain your current living status while you search for a new job. However, that money can disappear quickly, especially if you are left to pay for your own benefits. Most people assume that they will find a new job within 30 days of their job loss and are surprised that it can actually take much longer. Create a budget so that you can see how long you can live off of your severance pay. To make your severance money last as long as possible, cut back on any unnecessary living expenses for the time being and get started on your search sooner rather than later.

If you didn’t receive any severance money, you’ll also want to create a post-job budget as soon as possible. Take a look at how much money you have, which bills are coming due, and what expenses you won’t be able to cut. Make sure you can pay your critical bills—mortgage, car payment, insurance—and don’t spend money on anything extra. You may have to cancel an upcoming vacation or get rid of your cable TV, but you will be glad in six month’s time that you didn’t rack up credit card debt and that your savings is still intact.

Expand your search. Just because you worked for a large corporation in a large city doesn’t mean that’s the only type of job you are qualified to do. If you are searching only in Los Angeles, for example, think of looking outside the city or even in a different state. Or if you are looking only at large public corporations, consider small or private companies.

Your personal talents can lend themselves to a variety of different job titles. You just have to be open to them. Searching for a job outside your comfort zone can sometimes open you up to some great unexpected opportunities.

Be picky. If the bills keep rolling in and your paychecks have long since stopped, it can be easy to panic and take the first job that’s offered. Don’t leap into the wrong job. It’s important that you take your time, keep your cool, and ultimately make the right decision for you.

If money is low, get an interim job. It may not be something you would want to do in the long term, but it will provide you with a steady paycheck during your job search. That way you’ll have money coming in and you will be free to keep searching until you’ve found the right job for you. Taking the wrong job and ending up being miserable could cause a string of job hops that will cost you valuable time and effort.

Start your own business. While it may not be feasible for you to start your own small business from the ground up—complete with angel investors and expensive staff members—it may be just the time for you to put your talents to work as a freelancer. Are you a prolific writer or a graphics guru? Use your business savvy to start freelancing while you’re searching for a new job. It can provide a cushion of income in between jobs and maybe even continue to supplement you once you’ve landed a new gig.

Even better, the business in the meantime will keep your skills sharp and provide great references for your résumé. And doing work in between jobs can show a potential employer that you are motivated and that your skills are desirable.

Now, more than ever, is when being proactive counts the most. We live in an economy where there are fewer jobs and more people looking for them, and the competition is tough. This is just the reality. And as hard as it may seem at the time, the more objective that you can be about your job loss, the better the end result you will create for yourself. Don’t let losing your job define who you are; let the way you handle it define who you will be.

# # #

About the Book:

The Good Person Guidebook: Transforming Your Personal Life (Five O’Clock Books, 2008, ISBN: 978-0-944054-16-1, $14.95) is available at www.amazon.com.

For more information, please visit www.fiveoclockclub.com.



First Practical, Step-by-Step Blueprint for Talking and Flirting with Women No Matter If You?re Short, Old, Ugly, Flat-Broke, or Get Less Action Than a 40-Year Old Virgin!

Michael Lee asked:


You can either bump your head against the wall trying to think of the best ways to captivate a man, or you could simply apply any of the top 10 ways to attract a guy in this article.

These methods are not necessarily breakthrough information, but they have been proven to work with any type of men.

Tip # 1

There is probably nothing that attracts a guy towards a girl more than her genuine self. Therefore, girls need to learn how to be confident of their looks and overall self-image.

Most importantly, girls must never try to pretend to be someone else just to try and impress a guy. After all, most guys can see through a girl if she’s being genuine or not. And guys dislike their girls who try to wear another image since it reflects low self-esteem and insecurity.

Tip # 2

Appreciate a guy. As much as women spend time fixing herself or getting dressed, men also dedicate a substantial amount of time getting fixed.

Therefore, girls must try to be vocal about giving guys a compliment. You can either do it in a straightforward or playful manner. But still, knowing how to appreciate a man is one of the top 10 ways to attract a guy.

Tip # 3
In connection to the tip above, women must not try to overdo themselves when dressing up.

It is okay to take good care of your looks, but guys are turned off when women pay more attention to their looks than on their guy companion. As long as you’re presentable and clean, guys are fine with that.

Tip # 4

Produce a positive vibe. When you are a happy person, it is easy to spread that happiness onto the people around you. And if you can do that to a guy, then he’d love to be around you more often.

Tip # 5

Laugh at his jokes. This might seem trivial, but having a sense of humor and learning how to laugh together is one of the foundations to building a relationship; hence, this is one of the top 10 ways to attract a guy.

It ensures that you both are able to appreciate the brighter side of life and take things lightly from time to time.

Tip # 6

Use flirting body language. Sometimes, your gestures tell more about your feelings and intentions than words. Therefore, learn how to effectively send signals to a guy that you find him attractive and want to get to know better.

Tip # 7

Make eye contact. Your eyes can say a lot. And exchanging meaningful glances are one of the most effective ways to lure a guy towards you.

Tip # 8

When you spot a guy you like at a party, try to get close to him. Aside from sending out the message that you are attracted, it also shows how comfortable you are about yourself.

Tip # 9

Develop a fun and vibrant personality. With a personality such as this, it is easy for you to stand out in a crowd and enable guys to notice you.

Tip # 10

Be interested in the guy. Despite all the physical attraction, you should show interest in getting to know more about him.

Follow the top 10 ways to attract a guy in this article, and you’ll be captivating the man of your dreams in no time.



3 Secrets That Women Will Never Reveal To You

Adam Khoo asked:


There are four main classes of people in NLP and we normally refer to them as the “Visuals”, the “Auditories”, the “Kinesthetics” and the “Digitals”.

Each of these groups of people has certain general observable patterns of behaviors. Of course, these models are not meant to be cast into stone and followed like a set of rules. There are some exceptions and combination patterns.

However, we can say that at the point of interaction with the person, you can get clues as to what the other person’s representational type is. Finding out this representational type can help you establish rapport with them.

Here’s the first category, the “Visual”. You will tend to notice that a visual person is someone who tends to sit upright, is well organized and well grouped.

They have a tendency to speak rapidly in quick bursts, have a higher pitch of voice and they tend to visualize images in their minds. They have an active mind that wonders unless you have a good visual presentation. They also tend to look upwards in order to access information.

These are people whom I classify as high frequency people. If you take a look at their breathing patterns, they tend to be breathing high up in their chest. Neurologically, these people operate based on the neuro firing that takes place in their brain. When electrical impulses go off in their head, they generate images more rapidly than any chemical changes released.
To the other extreme, there are people who are much slower in their speech and tend to have deeper, resonant sounding voices. You will also notice that their breathing is much lower and takes place in the stomach area.

These people have difficulty sitting down for long periods of time, and are accustomed to moving around, touching and doing things. There is also a tendency for them to look down to get a feel for the environment around them.

Next are “Kinesthetic” people.

There are two kinds of “Kinesthetic” people.

The first kind tends to be more active. They are usually sports people, who enjoy the outdoors very much. The other kind of kinesthetics person tends to be more of a couch potato, who does not like outdoor activities and prefers to laze around and allow his mind to wonder.

The “Auditory” person is the type of person similar to the DJ we hear on the radio.

They usually have impactful and attractive voices that characteristically have wider variations and articulations. These people love discussions and are able to repeat things to you easily. There is also a tendency for them to lean forward and tilt their ear towards you or their hands might be on their cheek or close to their lips and ears. Their eyes tend to move to the left and right. Most auditory people also tend to be musically inclined.

They also have the ability to tell the difference between sounds, tunes, and melodies. These people tend to breathe in the diaphragm and I would classify them as mid frequency people.

The “Digital” personality is what you might consider a procedure and sequence person. He tends to do things step by step and is a person who loves abstract concepts.

There is plenty of internal dialogue and this person tends to process information logically. The digital personality tends to look downwards and to the left in order to access information. A person from this category exhibits characteristics of the other representational systems as well.

Knowledge of these four representational types will allow you to recognize differences in body language and gestures in order for you to be able to establish rapport with others more effectively.



How To Be The Ultimate Bad Boy Women Jealously Compete And Fight For

skeetv asked:


Snoop Dogg Sensual Seduction (Sexual Eruption) Music Video- Part 2 behind the scenes. Dj Skee chops it up with Snoop about his new album and video. Check out why he’s really Ego Trippin!

How a Former Stuttering, Shy Nerd Cracked the Code to Flirting with Women and Creating Sexual Attraction…

flirting tips

allyG asked:


ok so its kinda long…
me and my bestfriend meet these two really hot boys at the park..
but ones 3 years older than me and the other is 1 year older than me.
so it started raining so we got invited into the older boys house.
but then he wanted us to go up into his room with us..
so my friend decided it was time to go.
but now im going crazy because i really like both of them!
i want one to be my boy friend
so i need loads of flirting tips!!
help me plz i really need it
any tips would be great
or websites that have flirting tips too.

How a Former Stuttering, Shy Nerd Cracked the Code to Flirting with Women and Creating Sexual Attraction…

Can anyone give me some flirting tips?

Tiffany asked:


There’s this guy at my school, and today on a field trip we really hit it off. We found out we have a lot in common. He asked me to the upcoming dance, and I said yes. He seems to really like me, and I like him too.

Can anyone give me some flirting tips?

First Practical, Step-by-Step Blueprint for Talking and Flirting with Women No Matter If You?re Short, Old, Ugly, Flat-Broke, or Get Less Action Than a 40-Year Old Virgin!

Top Ten Flirting Tips That Work

Francis Githinji asked:


We are living in a world that is competitive and, everything you get must be the best. When it comes to flirting, there is no exception. This is because you need to get into the right relationship and go out with people that you are attracted to. One of the best ways to keep you ahead of others is to empower yourself with information in this regard. This is not just any information but the best. The following are top ten flirting tips which are undisputedly accurate. When you apply the advice in your life, you will definitely see a difference in your relationships. The tips are provided by experts who have been in the field for many years. You will know what to do and most importantly how to do everything right to attract and keep the woman or man you like. The top ten tips are as follows. The first tip goes to all women folk, wear red. Yes, wear the color that represents power. Nobody looks bad in red and you can have some twist to your outfit. This means that you can accessorize in red or wear red shoes. You can go all out and wear red lipstick. This should be done in a very subtle way. Let’s face it, red looks so hot and so will you.

People will be captured by you and, this is not forgetting the person you intend to flirt with. He will not have a second thought. The tip for ladies is to smile. You create a different mood; of joy. Everyone wants to be around a joyous person and, this will definitely do the trick. However, make sure that your smile is genuine. Many women have been known to smile while feeling sick inside. Smile and mean it. As I continue with my top ten flirting tips, I want to mention that smiling goes both ways. Guys should also have a good smile that will ensure the lady is receptive. The next tip is the eyes. They are windows to the soul and trust me; this is the time you want your soul to reflect. You need to hold a gaze that is going to announce affection. This is also done by both men and women. In my opinion, the eyes are the most powerful tools of flirting and more and more people should make use of them.

I’m sure you have heard about smiling eyes. Yes, there is a way that you can smile without opening your mouth and, it can be seen through your eyes. When you know how to do this, you will definitely find favor with your partner in more ways than one. A good flirt is never complete without touch. A touch needs to be very subtle. You will warm into the touch when you start communicating at a deeper level. Other top ten flirting tips include engaging humor. Everyone has the capacity to say something funny; it is human nature. However, whether the joke is actually funny or not will be judged by the person you are with. The key is not to think too much about it. When you let everything flow naturally, you will find yourself giggling and laughing away. When this happens, you will know you have done everything right. The other thing that is vital is being you. With this top ten flirting tips, you will take your relationships to the next level.



First Practical, Step-by-Step Blueprint for Talking and Flirting with Women No Matter If You?re Short, Old, Ugly, Flat-Broke, or Get Less Action Than a 40-Year Old Virgin!

Does anyone have any good flirting tips?

Random asked:


There is a girl in my class that I used to flirt with a lot, but this week, we haven’t really talked. Does anyone have any tips? (i.e. topics, relaxing, etc.)

How a Former Stuttering, Shy Nerd Cracked the Code to Flirting with Women and Creating Sexual Attraction…

Joshua Uebergang asked:


“Opposites attract” is a law of attraction, at least where electromagnetism is concerned. But are there laws about attraction between two people?

“In a world that is full of strangers” as a line in a famous song of the 1980’s goes, is there a clear set of rules that allows two people to fall for each other?

Is attraction a matter of chemistry?

Maybe. According to scientists, the attraction between animals of the opposite sex is all about chemicals called pheromones. The effect of pheromones in behavior of insects is the most studied to date. It has been observed, at least in some experiments, that pheromones are responsible for communication among same species and colony of ants. The horrible odor released by skunks to ward off enemies is said to be a kind of pheromone. Some species of apes rub pheromone-containing urine on the feet of potential mates to attract them.

Scientists believe that animals (usually the females) such as insects and mammals send out these chemical signals to tell the male of their species that their genes are different from theirs. This gene diversity is important in producing offspring with better chances of survival. The perfume industry has capitalized on pheromones as a means to increase one’s sexual attractiveness to the opposite sex. Animals such as the whale and the musk deer were hunted down for these chemicals.

Lately, scientists are looking into the existence of human pheromones and its role in mate selection. There are many conflicting views in the realm of biology, chemistry, genetics, and psychology. Most scientists would assert that these do not exist, or if they do, do not play a role in sexual attraction between a man and a woman. But new researches such as that conducted by Swiss researchers from the University of Bern led by Klaus Wedekind are slowly making these scientists rethink their stand. Their experiment involved women sniffing the cotton shirts of different men during their ovulation period. It was found out that women prefer the smell of men’s shirts that were genetically different, but also shared similarities with the women’s genes. This, like in the case of insects and other mammals, was to ensure better and healthier characteristics for their future children. But researchers also cautioned that preference for a male odor is affected by:

- The women’s ovulation period

- The food that men eat

- Perfumes and other scented body products

- And lastly the use of contraceptive pills.

Does personality figure in sexual attraction?

Yes, but so does your perception of a potential mate’s personality. According to a research conducted by Klohnen, E.C., & S. Luo in 2003 on interpersonal attraction and personality, a person’s sense of self-security and at least the person’s perception of his/her partner were found to be strong determinants of attraction in hypothetical situations. What does this tell us? We prefer a certain personality type, which attracts you to a person. But aside from the actual personality of the person, which can only be verified through close interaction through time, it is your perception of your potential partner that attracts you to him/her, whether the person of your affection truly has that kind of personality or not. This could probably account for a statement commonly heard from men and women on their failed relationships: “I thought he/she was this kind of person.”

So how does attraction figure in relationships?

You have probably heard that attraction is a prelude, or a factor towards a relationship. Most probably, at least in the beginning; but attraction alone cannot make a relationship work. It is that attraction that makes you notice a person from the opposite sex, but once you get to know the person more, attraction is just one consideration. Shared values, dreams, and passions become more significant in long-term relationships.

So should I stop trying to become attractive?

More than trying to become physically attractive, work on all aspects of your health: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Physical attraction is still a precursor. Remember, biology predisposes us to choose the partner with the healthiest genes. Where your emotions are concerned, just ask this to yourself: would you want to spend time with a person who feels insecure about him/herself?

Probably not! There is wisdom in knowing yourself: who you are, your beliefs, values, and dreams. And do not pretend to be someone you are not. Fooling another person by making him/her think that you share the same values and beliefs is only going to cause you both disappointments. When you are healthy in all aspects, attractiveness becomes a consequence and not an end. As mentioned in the Klohnen and Luo’s research, a person’s sense of self-security matters, perhaps even beyond attraction. But remember: do these things for yourself and not for other people. Only then can you truly harness your attractiveness as a person.



How a Former Stuttering, Shy Nerd Cracked the Code to Flirting with Women and Creating Sexual Attraction…

The Hottest Flirting Tips For Men And Women

Damian DeAngelo asked:


Whether you have just started or are returning to the dating game, flirting is an essential element of communicating with the opposite sex. Having a few flirting tips in your arsenal will give you clues on how to relax and behave while you’re chatting up a cutie. Learning helpful flirting tips isn’t simply reserved for teenage girls; men and women of all ages could benefit from flirting tips. Whether it is body language or simple conversation, flirting with the object of your affection requires practice and confidence.

There are two key flirting tips to which all successful flirters adhere. The first is always smile. When you smile you look nice and inviting, like someone worth getting to know. Like everything, this is one of those flirting tips that’s best used in moderation; smiling too much for too long will make you look like a drooling psych patient and scare off potential mates. Flash your pearly whites when you make your introduction and keep a light smile throughout the conversation.

The second most important of all flirting tips is eye contact. When you finally get up the nerve to talk to the cutie you’ve been eying all night, look them directly in the eye. Perfect application of this tip should result in you and your crush huddled in the corner getting to know each other. Making and maintaining eye contact throughout your first interaction will make a deep impression on your crush and likely result in you getting their digits.

Other flirting tips you might find helpful:

? Keep the conversation light and casual; discussing children in third world nations or religion should be reserved for at least the third date.

? Be real and don’t dish out cheesy pick up lines or phony stories.

? Keep your relationship history to a minimum; no need to reveal the cause or causes of your previous break ups.

? Be funny and make her or him laugh. This will ease tension and allow you to open up quicker.

? Make physical contact but keep it G-rated. A light pat or squeeze of the arm or a pat on the shoulder will suffice. Covering your hand with theirs is also permitted for emphasis in a story.

? If you’re at a bar or restaurant, offer to buy a drink. This move works on both sexes so ladies get out your wallets!

? Tease them a bit. Give them something to wonder a bit about. Don’t give out all of your secrets all at once and make them want to know you better.

? Be bold; after executing all of these flirting tips flawlessly, it would be a shame not to ask for the phone number.

Remember these flirting tips the next time you spot someone you might be interested in or before you get up the nerve to talk to the object of your affection. Remember practice makes perfect, so don’t be afraid to try and if it doesn’t work out, just keep trying!



flirting tips

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